The Fat Kid reporting. . .

Clintonville – After several years of supplying BZ staffers with some kind of structure to hang around in the parking lot, and several months of bumping that obnoxious redneck noise known as bluegrass every Saturday morning, Gary Doe has died.

The Fat Kid reporting. . .

We’ll miss you, Harry.

Harry “the K” Kalas, greatest broadcaster in the history of Illy Philly, died in Washington on Monday (4/13/09) after collapsing in the broadcast booth while preparing to announce a Phillies/Nationals game. He was 73 years old. Harry was the Phillies' play-by-play announcer for 38 years, and during that time he called every single one of Michael Jack Schmidt’s 548 home runs. Phillies fans everywhere (even those of us on the moors of Ohio) will miss Harry. If there was a god, this is where I’d start trying to negotiate a trade: we’ll give you Chris Wheeler, Gary Matthews, and a first-round draft pick to have Harry back. . .

The Fat Kid reporting. . .

Upper Arlington – After many months without hearing from BZ’s erstwhile reporter and present day troll, The Shadow, we here at the BZ offices received a cryptic missive that seems to have originated under his Shadowy Bridge.