A faithful reader sent us this email on April 14, 2008 detailing recent alien activity at the Waterford Estates MHC. -BZ
The following is a true and accurate account (subject to occasional alcohol-induced hallucinations) of events occurring on or about March 17, 2008. You may edit for content, quality or convenience, as is deemed fit.
On March 17, 2008, I went to A Piece of Ireland where I met up with my brother and his wife, as well as some of my AOH brothers. I consumed lots of Guinness and enjoyed the traditional music (“American Pie” was a crowd favorite, as was the Metallica cover of “Whiskey in the Jar”). I returned home at an undetermined time, sure only that it was after sunset, and fell out of my SUV. While lying prone on the driveway, I noticed a strange green glow between the trailers to the right of mine. I staggered in that direction and turned the corner facing the Shed of Light between the properties.
Immediately, the glow disappeared. Apparently, I interrupted some sort of alien activity and startled my interstellar “friends.” However, having the presence of mind to document the event, I pulled out my handy-dandy camera phone and took the following picture:
Biaviian Anti-Gravity device ominously not floating in front of the Shed of Light
Even in an inebriated state, I recognized the object (having had one previously, which mysteriously teleported to some shit-hole Midwestern, Billary-leaning town). It was a Biaviian anti-gravity device! Stunned, I turned and ran towards my home to tell the wife of my good fortune. Unfortunately, I caught the corner of my neighbor's house square in the face and fell to the ground unconscious. When I awoke, the device was gone. Saddened at yet again seeing it slip through my hands, I turned toward home, and to my amazement once again spied the device. It had inexplicably moved to the front patio. Once again, I snapped a pic with my camera-phone:
Biaviian device some time later in the same night
Not wanting to repeat untimely unconsciousness and possibly lose the object again, I quickly grabbed the device and wheeled it (I don’t possess the alien ability to defy gravity) to my shed of darkness.
Overjoyed, I made my way home to share the news with my wife (Spanish-speaking but not a washer-woman). Upon relating the day’s events and my good fortune, she responded, “What the fuck? Are you drunk again?” and went back to sleep.
I didn’t fully understand until morning. Having requested a vacation day following the annual Irish Binge, I logged on to the computer to check email, MySpace, etc. After viewing the usual sites I pulled up BlueZer0.net and read with horror the previous day’s events. Surely, the coincidence is too great and there must be some meaning and connection. Being severely hung over, I was in no condition to think clearly and decided it was too great for my comprehension.
Mabus
Bear, Delaware
Comments (3)
What? The new Mrs. Buckalew didn't report a prowler in her garden?
Posted by Pimples Malone | April 19, 2008 12:22 AM
Posted on April 19, 2008 00:22
Oh, are you sure you didn't trip over an old car battery (Buckalew prowler trap)?
Posted by Pimples Malone | April 19, 2008 12:32 AM
Posted on April 19, 2008 00:32
The gossip here is all about a crashed and heavily damaged sofa shaped ufo hidden in a secret hanger beneath the Buckalew Palace. Maybe this is the source of the Biaviian anti-gravity devices?
Posted by Felix of Waterford's Town Watch Program | April 19, 2008 12:39 AM
Posted on April 19, 2008 00:39